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5 Signs of Pulpit Abuse

  1. God Told Me - A leader's dream, prophecy, discernment or "word" ends the discussion and overrides another person's consent. (Jeremiah 23:25-32)

  2. Loyalty to The Leader is Loyalty to God - Questioning the pastor becomes "rebellion". Disagreement is treated as dishonoring God or opposing the Spirit. ​(2 Cor 1:24)

  3. Pastoral Influence Expands into Personal Sovereignty- Leaders control relationships, marriage, employment, finances, medical decisions, family contact, etc. (Mark 10:42-45) (1 Peter 5:2-3)

  4. ​Fear and Divine Consequences Enforce Obedience - "If you leave, you'll lose your covering." "God will punish you." "Your calling will die." "You will open yourself to demons." (Matthew 18:6)

  5. ​Scripture Becomes An Instrument of Control - Submission, honor, unity, forgiveness, church discipline, or "touch not My anointed" are used to protect authority. (Matthew 23:4)

from Please Don't Make Me Fall: Healed by His Grace When Church Hurt -10 Signs of Pastoral Abuse.

5 Signs That You Are Carrying Church Hurt

  1. Scattered and Withdrawn - Stop attending, serving, joining small groups, or answering church call; only watch church. online or not at all. The sheep were scattered and wandered because they were not tended. (Ezekiel 34:5-6)

  2. Feeling Driven Away - Departure follows rejection, exclusion, humiliation, betrayal, or "Don't come back to our church." (Ezekiel 34:4 and 16)

  3. Spiritual and Emotional Exhaustion - Feels drained by church stuff; no longer has the capacity to serve. (Matthew 9:36)

  4. An Unbound Wound - The event continues to hurt long afterward. Sermons, worship songs, phrases, correction, or church invitations trigger the pain. (Ezekiel 34:4, 16)

  5. Guardedness and Generalized Distrust - Reluctant to share personal information, join another church, submit, serve or trust another pastor; continually scans for hidden motives. (John 10:11-14)

*from Please Don't Make Me Fall: Healed by His Grace When Church Hurt - 10 Signs That You're Carrying Church Hurt.​

A man's spirit will endure sickness, but a crushed spirit who can bear?

Proverbs 18:14

5 Signs of Pastoral Sexual Exploitation 

  1. He Repeatedly Seeks Out Women In Crisis - He gravitates toward  the grieving, recently divorces, rejected, financially distressed, traumatized, spiritually hungry or socially isolated. 

  2. He Become Her Indispensable Rescuer - He presents himself as the only person who understands her, can protect her, hear God for her, or help her fulfill her calling.

  3. He Creates Private, Exclusive Access - Personal texts, late-night calls, private counseling, rides, home visits, secret meetings, or conversations no one else knows about become increasingly frequent.

  4. He Demands Secrecy - "Protect the ministry" "Don't hurt my family." "People will call this wrong because they aren't. spiritual enough to understand us."

  5. He Gradually Tests Boundaries - Appearance comments become sexual comments; hugs last a little longer; prayer becomes touching; innocent meetings become intimate meetings. Each crossing opens the door to the next. 

from Please Don't Make Me Fall: Healed by His Grace When Church Hurt -Signs of Pastoral Sexual Exploitation 

I know what it feels like to have your spirit crushed by pastors who were supposed to care for it. The pain leaves you confused, wandering, feeling lost and hopeless and scared to trust again. Jesus never intended His sheep...His daughters...to be hurt, especially not by those in the Church who are charged to love and protect them. I also know what it feels like to be rescued by Goel, my Redeemer. I'm living proof that your spirit can heal and be whole, and you can learn to love and trust again. 

Healing From Church Hurt: 5 Biblical Steps

  1. Pray - Ask God to lead you to the root of the wound. Identifying it brings spiritual clarity to the situation. 

  2. Seek Wise Counsel- If not in the church, begin with a licensed therapist. 

  3. Don't Confuse Them for Him - Their abuse is a misrepresentation of Christ's love.

  4. Examine Yourself - Ask yourself, 'did I do anything to influence their behavior?' This isn't claiming responsibility for their actions, it taking accountability for yours.

  5. Forgive Without Forging the Facts - Forgiveness releases God's vengeance. 

A shepherd is called to cover vulnerability with care, not uncover it for access. A woman who came for prayer didn't come to be prey. If he uses the shepherd's staff to draw her close for himself, he has stopped shepherding and started hunting. ~ KSF

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©2020-2026 by Katina Shoni Freeman Ministries

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